Written for the February edition of the East End MOPS Newsletter.
Contrary to popular belief, the two are not mutually exclusive. However, rekindling your love life in the midst of toddler tantrums, poopy diapers, and sleep deprivation is a challenge, possibly one of the biggest challenges we face in this season of our lives.
WARNING: If you are one of those lovey-dovey, sickeningly sappy couples who are constantly kissing, cuddling, and praising your mate’s many achievements, this article is not for you. (By the way, you are grossing us out.)
This article is for those who were once high on the Mountain of Romance but now find themselves a little low in The Valley of Routine.
I am not about to give you instructions guaranteed to spark the flame.
Nope. Not here.
I will instead highlight a few symptoms of a marriage in need of romance.
You might need a night out with your spouse if…
· You have come to believe that your husband’s primary function in your home is Designated Trash Bag Remover and/or Chief Spider Killer.
· The last three movies you saw in the theater were Tangled, Toy Story 3, and Despicable Me.
· A wild night is now defined as one in which you are up every three hours with the latest victims of the stomach virus.
· You find yourself fantasizing about being married to (fill in the blank).
· Your idea of quality couples time is the Saturday night grocery shopping spree.
· You can’t remember the last time you held hands.
· Romantic conversation consists of discussing your toddler’s infatuation with the babysitter.
· Your panty drawer screams “GRANNY!” and you are still wearing bras of the nursing variety, despite the fact that your child weaned two years ago.
· You get a babysitter for the weekend but use the time only to catch up on housework.
· You change your snot wiped, spit-up stained, pureed carrot splattered pajama top for a fresh t-shirt and your husband is now sure he’s getting the green light tonight.
Seriously, if you are the mother of young children, chances are a few of these are going to be pretty familiar, and that’s okay. I harbor no judgment. We’ve all been there, right?
But please, schedule a date night. And do it soon.
Disclaimer: I am not now, nor have I ever been a marriage counselor. My advice should be taken with a snort and a giggle.
2 comments:
I love this. I am espcially guilty of not giving up the nursing bras. I had an ugly beige one that I wore almost every day for WAY TOO LONG I just threw away a year ago. And guess what? I've already bought a new one for this baby.
I still wear my maternity pants...they are just elastic waist so I try to justify it...but they are still maternity pants! This list made me literally LOL!!!
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